I was 13, I think.  So excited to be serving at the camp I grew up going to.  I worked in the kitchen because I was too young for other positions, but someday, I'm going to be a counselor just like the ones I had.  And then that happened.  His condemning voice echoed all through the dining hall in front of all of those kids and counselors as he yelled and made accusations that were not even close to true.  I begged to go to the kitchen to talk about it, but he insisted to publicly slice with his tongue.

At 17 I thought maybe I was being called to missions.  I had served at camps and had been overseas a couple of times and I was seriously exploring what my next steps in this avenue were.  I sought council from someone in leadership. I was told it would be best to let them support someone else now, I had my turn.

My first baby and things just aren't working out the way they should.  Overwhelming emotions and things just aren't fitting into place the way I had thought they would.  Nursing is a disaster (how on earth could that be when that's what God designed?)  and she says "if the women in Africa can do it, you can too.  They don't have the option to quit, their baby will die."

The kids are acting...well, I suppose like kids, but I've had enough of the chaos, tattling and complaints.  I blow.  The ivory bars that caged the fiery tongue opened and left in the wake are 4 kids, eyes wide and quiet.

There have been so many more great words spoken over me than bad, and for that I am so thankful.   I wish I could think of specific words of encouragement that have stuck as strongly as the others I mentioned so I could share them with you.

The purpose of all of this is:  Words.  Every one of them count.  They are packed with power.  Power to give life and power to cause death. Proverbs 18:21.  They are like a seed planted in a life.  Are we sowing weeds or seeds that will bear much fruit?  

I am the first to admit, I misuse words.  The result is never what I had hoped when I didn't use them with loving, careful thought.  James 3:2-10 talks about how we stumble in many ways and need to bridle our tongue like a horse, as it steers the whole body.  And like a large ship driven by strong winds, is guided by a very small rudder.  So also the tongue is a small member, yet it boasts of great things.

Those ugly times when people mess up and say things they shouldn't don't have to define us.  I know the words spoken over me didn't define me.  They left a little scarring to deal with, but thankfully I had parents, friends and others that reminded me who God says I am.

It is my hope that as I continue to walk close to the Lord, studying His word, applying his precious lessons and truth to my life that I will have more moments of life giving then causing death with my tongue.  Colossians 4:6 Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person.

Christian, give life with your words.  Be kind.  Build others up so it may benefit those who listen. Eph 4:8

Proverbs 31:26 She opens her mouth with wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.

This is who I want to be.